Welcome!
You’ve found one of the original posts from Love Without Traffic, a blog that unexpectedly evolved into The Relationship Ride and several projects that followed.
While this site remains home to years of writing and adventures, most of my current work now lives at NancyKoenig.com.
Over there you’ll find newer blog posts, updates on The Relationship Ride and Love Without Traffic, Reflowerment®, energy healing, and whatever unexpected creative rabbit hole I’ve wandered into lately.
If you’re looking for my latest writing, start here:
If you are here for the archives, read on.
And if you happen to notice references to book launches, timelines, or plans that have aged in interesting ways, consider them part of the historical record.
I’m glad you found your way here.
— Nancy
How often do you allow your mind to talk you out of decisions you want to make? When we allow our minds to veto our heart’s choices, our lives can feel devoid of magic. Empty. Even filled with regret.
Our bodies are the gateways to our wisdom. Yet for most, this habit of making choices with our brains is so ingrained, we don’t even see the issue with it. We were taught to “think about it” and “think things through.” How many other phrases like that can you remember being told while growing up? What a limited way to live!
Last spring, I got one of the best lessons of my life on this topic. My mind did everything it could to prevent, or at least postpone, the “mom mission” – an inspired idea to take a spontaneous drive from Florida to New York, to see my mom for the first time since the lockdown.
My mind presented a long list of very convincing reasons it wasn’t the right time, professionally, financially and otherwise. When that didn’t work, it did its best to instill some fear of the trip itself – what a long drive to take solo! That worked to some degree but when I was still leaning toward going, my mind went for its speciality: logic.
“Just wait until things ‘open up’ more!” it said. My mom’s assisted living center had only just begun allowing visits so my mind, suddenly a math expert, insisted if I went for nine days, I’d only get to see her for a total of 90 minutes.
If I’d listened to my mind, I wouldn’t have seen her at all.
Since I instead listened to my heart, I got to share a very beautiful reunion with my mom a year ago this week. I got to look deeply into her eyes and see right through the body that was giving her so much trouble, directly into her soul. I got to hand her an advance copy of Love Without Traffic, and watch her eyes tear up with joy, as mine did the same. I got to hug her.
Because I didn’t heed the warnings of my mind, I got to share not only 90 minutes, but also the last months of my mom’s life with her. I got to bypass the crushing weight of regret I’d be experiencing today if I’d made any other choice.
As far as my heart was concerned, there was no other choice. It didn’t seem like the right time, for so many reasons, but my mind could not have been more mistaken.
Because I made that heart and faith-based choice, I was blessed with an abundance of miracles. A friend I’d only just recently connected with and a coaching client I had yet to meet off video offered wonderful places to stay along the way, and incredible experiences to go along with them. The trip itself turned into quite an adventure.
And then, as those of you who followed the mission last year know, I was invited to pet sit right near my mom’s assisted living center, for what turned out to be six months, by someone I’d never even had a conversation with.
That it came complete with a botanical garden, the likes of which I witnessed the most beautiful spring and summer ever, an inground pool, and two of the sweetest animals I’ve ever met were just bonus points.
I was blessed with so many beautiful experiences there, with my mom, family and friends I hadn’t seen in far too long. Someday, I’ll share the full story. Sometimes, even I can’t believe all that happened during what went from a nine-day to six-month stay in New York. One year later, still I’m in complete awe. I look forward to sharing more of the details, and where the journey of grief has taken me since, soon.
For now, I’m just enjoying another beautiful sprig, this time in the Asheville area of North Carolina, where I’ve experienced incredible synchronicities and incredible sign upon incredible sign that my mom has been with me.
It’s been a two-month adventure that my heart needed so very much. One I can’t even imagine having not set off upon.
And one I wouldn’t have gotten to experience if I’d listened to my mind.
What is your mind trying to prevent you from doing right now? What does your heart say? Your body?